100 Things I've Learned in London

100 Random and Fun things I’ve learned while studying abroad in London:

1. British Sarcasm is nothing like American Sarcasm. 
2. British people don’t find us funny.
3. Just as American’s don’t live like the TV show ‘Friends,’ the British youth do not live like the show ‘Skins.’
4. Pants in British terms means underwear and trousers mean pants.
5. It’s a mobile…not a cell phone.
6. England is not Lord of the Rings. Meaning: it is York-shur NOT York-shire.
7. People don’t really eat fish and chips that much. They rather have mash, beans, and sausage.
8. They don’t really know what the word ‘sassy’ means, so I explain it as ‘cheeky with attitude.’
9. Just as we say ‘bucks’ instead of dollars, Brits say ‘quid’ instead of pounds. “I paid 20 quid for that!”
10. After work, you don’t head home. You go to a pub and get a pint. Do not be surprised in the afternoon of any day you see dozens of men in suits standing outside a pub having a drink.
11. Be careful with the coin pounds (£). They are not ‘cheap change’ and you will most likely spend them quickly and freely!
12. No matter where you are in the world, always look both ways [at least 5 times] when crossing the street.
13. If you don’t know how to get somewhere, just hop onto a bus in that general direction. You’ll find your way eventually.
14. The drivers test in England is 10x harder than the one we have in the states.
15. When buying a Guinness in London, you will never pay less than £2.70 and you should never pay any more than £4.95.
16. When Tesco has Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream on sale, buy it. You don’t want to be caught paying the full price of £5.50!!!!
17. Most British bands and singers that we know in the states aren’t that famous in England.
18. British people are measured in ‘stones.’ 1 stone = 14 pounds.
19. When you visit England, drink a Magners or Bulmers. They are ciders and we don’t have them at home.
20. Along the same lines, you should probably try Ginger Beer. That is hard to find at home.
21. If you want to go to the gym, but are used to lifting in ‘pounds.’ Just take whatever you usually bench/squat and divide it by two. It is a good approximation. (I.E. I want to squat 100 lb. So I put 25 kg on both side of the bar.)
22. Your British friends most likely will not find that YouTube clip you are about to show them funny.
23. People run to work and run home from work. If you see someone zoom by with a backpack on, they most likely just got out of work.
24. Taking the tube is actually a hassle. I would recommend the buses to anyone.
25. England is the country. The United Kingdom is made up of Scotland, Wales, and England. Great Britain is the UK, Wales, Scotland, and Northern Ireland.
26. Scottish people can’t stand England and England believes Scotland can’t survive without it.
27. I have a friend whose dogs are named Poppit and Henry. That wins as the most British animal names possible.
28. The London Tube is a lot more expensive than the Paris Metro, but at least it is not covered in graffiti and pee.
29. If you hear Adele’s “Someone Like You” in a Karaoke Bar, every English person (male and female) will stop what they are doing and sing along.
30. In the states, we use the terms “Asian,” “Indian,” and “Middle Eastern,” to refer to certain people, but in England everyone is just “Asian.”
31.  Leicester Square during the day is 100% different than Leicester Square at night.
32. The Union Jack is the flag of Great Britain. England’s flag is just St George's Cross.
33. Just as American money has cents, the British money has the pence. To shorten they just call it a ‘p.’ “I’ll give you 50p for that!”
34. The Queen actually does nothing.
35. British people don’t care about the monarchy………… at all.
36. British students still complain about school loans, but they really have no idea at all what real school loans are/how much American schools cost.
37. You do not want to be called a Chav.
38. That really pretty bridge you are taking a picture of most likely has a gay club under it at night.
39. You can only climb The Big Ben if you are a UK citizen.
40. Harry Potter’s Diagon Alley used to filmed in Covent Garden until they decided to just entirely build a whole new set of it.
41. Harry Potter’s Gringotts Bank is actually the Australian Embassy.
42. Dumbledore’s office is found in Kings College’s Maughan Library. If you want to actually do work in there, you should probably show up at 4 AM.
43. People put mayonnaise on everything. They even eat it plain with French fries.
44. Do NOT see a movie in Leicester Square. You will pay at least £16.
45. Geordie Shore is just as bad as the Jersey Shore.
46. Calling someone ‘fit’ is equivalent to calling someone ‘hot.’
47. British teens have prom and take it just as seriously, but theirs is outfitted with alcohol since they are legal.
48. A benefit of having a quasi-socialist government is the BBC. It is probably the most un-biased news ever, as it is funded by citizen taxes.
49.  Northern accents are unbearable.
50. The British university system makes little to not sense and I am still surprised that people learn here.
51. Unlike America’s affirmative action, Oxford and Cambridge’s affirmative action means that there must be spots open for public school kids.
52. If you want your child to be successful and famous, send them to Eton College for prep school.
53.  Hackney (AKA East London) is not as bad as everyone makes it out to seem…now South London on the other hand…
54. While Americans like to compare American football and rugby, the Brits would be offended to even try liken the two.
55. Instead of touch football, the youth actually play cricket.
56. No matter how many times people explain the rules of cricket, you won’t understand it.
57. Professional cricket games have tea times….and can go on for days.
58. They had to move the famous guards from the front of Buckingham Palace to behind the gates since so many tourists were harassing them.
59. If you visit London, you have to visit a  £5 Indian buffet. It will change your life.
60. Though some English people think they are ‘tough,’ I would love to drop them off in Camden, NJ or Detroit and tell them to act ‘tough.’
61. British people never write z’s in the middle of words. For example, we write colonize. They write ‘colonise.’ We write recognize. They write ‘recognise.’
62. British people do not know the difference between New York State and New York City.
63. Subway still has the £5 foot-long even though they don’t measure things in feet.
64.  That being said, they only really know where NYC, LA, Chicago, and D.C. are. The rest of the country is a mystery.
65. British people don’t understand why American’s always compare ethnic backgrounds. “Aren’t you American?” “Well…no…I’m 20% Irish, 40% Italian, and 40% German…”
66. According to everyone, England didn’t need America to win WWII….or WWI.
67. Expect to pay an obnoxious amount of money on groceries.
68. If you do not get into Medic School (AKA Medical school, which starts freshmen year of uni) then you are screwed and most likely go into Biomedical Sciences.
69. They play netball instead of basketball.
70. They don’t understand the concept of a ‘liberal arts education.’
71. While American’s splurge and go skiing ‘out west,’ the English go to the Alps or Austria. Yeah…I know where I’d rather go…
72. Primark is a touristy shop. English people see it as cheap and gross, but I see it as a gift to my wallet!
73. Topshop is overpriced and ridiculous. And that 20% student discount won’t help.
74. British people don’t eat Mexican food and have a hard time understanding the difference between a burrito and a taco.
75. That smell you just smelled on the street is most likely marijuana. That’s the ‘bonus’ of everyone rolling their own cigarettes.
76. From the British prospective, the Falkland Island inhabitants actually want to be UK citizens.
77. Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre is around a half a mile away from the one standing toady.
78. ASDA is England’s Wal-Mart. Literally…it is the same thing, but the company had to rename it to ASDA to fool the residents that thought negatively of Wal-Mart.
79. English people pride themselves of eating fresh food with zero preservatives (Unlike the US), but that also means that all their salads, fruits, and veggies go bad in a day.
80. There is a Law and Order UK, but it is truly awful.
81. Abbey Road is a working road, so don’t get hit by residential cars as you cross it.
82. Dogs in every country except America are well behaved and are never walked on leashes.
83. In every country except America, expect to find dog poop on the sidewalk.
84. In London, there is actually a law that states that bikers are forbidden from biking on the sidewalk. I don’t know how there aren’t more accidents.
85. America is trying to make our healthcare more like the NHS, and England is trying to make their healthcare more like America.
86. You would be surprised how many British celebrities you don’t know about.
87. If you are a true Brit, you don’t support a Premiere League team (examples: Chelsea, Manchester United, Liverpool). You support that nothing team from your hometown.
88. British people don’t have ‘hipsters’ and don’t understand what ‘bro-laxers’ are.
89. You’ll know when someone has a posh accent when you hear it.
90. British people use the word proper for everything. ‘Proper tea,’ ‘proper meal,’ or ‘proper sleep.’
91. Even though it rains so much here, no one really wears rain boots or a proper rain jacket.
92. They actually say the word ‘bloody.’ “Well why don’t you just go and bloody do it already!”
93. You don’t know where you are going to university until you get you’re A-level scores back. That means you aren’t really in anywhere really until a month before you move into the dorm.
94. We say yo-gurt, they say ‘yuur-gurt.’
95. British university is only three years, but almost everyone takes a gap year between high school and college.
96. Next year, university tuition in tripling. That means instead of paying £3,000 a year, students are paying a whopping £9,000.
97. The new socialist government in France will do wonders for London. Since the rich are now going to be taxed 75% in France, they all plan on moving into Chelsea and Kensington in London and spending all their mullah.
98. After 5 PM on Sundays, all the big groceries are closed, so don’t make that mistake…
99. The month of May is a month of rain. You can go up to 2 weeks without seeing the sun.
100. When you ask any British person to mock an American, three thing will always come up: Obama, Jesus, and Hamburgers….oh- and how loud we are.